I'm tired y'all. And I have a pinched nerve in my neck that has caused a knot the size of a golf ball in my neck. For the past week I have been going to bed well past midnight to finish commissions. Last night i got to bed at 3:33am. I just remembered cause it's a cool time. I am hardly coherent today. It is my day off and this morning I got some prints ready for a client that I was delivering a commission to. It was a 36x36 painting. I finished an 18x25 going to Myrtle Beach and before that was a 16x20 going to Pennsylvania. And it is not procrastination that is the problem, it is my damn JOB that gets in the way of my daylight hour painting! Hey, God! I have been asking really nicely for that bag of money. What gives? When is it coming? I have dogs to paint darnit and all these brochures are getting in my damn way!

I am delivering another painting at 2:30pm and I have to finish up my new, um, what do I call them? My brain is asleep. Product i am selling for Christmas. I have to have the ad done to go on Pampered Puppy by Sunday. But really it has to be today because ya know what I am doing today? Getting the hell out of dodge! This week was just the beginning of the mad holiday painting craziness. So me and Best Boyfriend Ever are hightailing it out of town to Pensacola to see his family and hang with the coolest couple ever. I cant wait to get out of here, but still have a bazillion things to do before then. Like write this blog. Cause me? I gots me priorities!! And I have so little time, but keeping my reader informed of my whereabouts is important. Cause I know you care. heh.

But I will say this. There are some things you learn at 3am watching emergency surgery shows on Discovery Health while you paint. When an appendix burst, you don't want to be in a teaching hospital. I am telling you those two doctors looked like they were playing operation and actually slipped with the metal thingy that holds your gut open. You don't want to get stuck by a needle just used on an illegal alien in a Texas hospital. you don't want to BE an illegal alien running from the border patrol cause when you get hit by a car, your spine can bend at a 45 degree angle and it looks REALLY painful! (but I bet he spent less (read: NOTHING) than I did for my broken finger And luckily I am tired cause what a rant THAT could turn into!) And finally, seatbelts are INDEED a good thing. Cause when you don't wear them? You get into the ER and you can have the top part of your head all flippy flappy and open so that every one sees your brain. The moral of the story? Get started on your painting earlier in the day if you can, create less brochures for more painting time and wear your seatbelts people.


Here is one of my paintings I did this week that I just delivered, it is 36x36 and will hang over baby Amelia's crib (awwwww):

Working from home today. I will get my design work done and paint at lunch. The second I am off work at 2pm I need to finish up a painting of two cats, two super cute wheaton terriers and sketch out a big 4'x4' for a nursery of two adorable pooches. Plus I need to get all the cards and prints I make online because the lovely Christine, owner of Bubbles and Biscuits wants to carry my cards and prints. I figure it is a great test market and an opportunity not to let go by. Working from home makes me miss it so much. I went that past two years doing it and altho i love my pt job at the college, I can't wait for they day i can be doing my art again full time. But bills must be paid and at least i love the job and the people I work with. That is a plus. The time will come again and I am more patient than I have ever been, not sure why, but I am just content to live life lately. It's a good feeling.

Will post pics soon of things I am working on. Time to go design a program and do some brochure edits.

Oh, and I GAINED 1.5 lbs! BAh! Serves me right for eating all that salad and doing all that running this weekend! My body is obviously very upset with me at the lack of WINE. But I will be a good girl, there is a pretty red dress and great jeans hanging in my closet that I want to wear more than I want that wine or donut. Well, not really, but I can always run another mile, right? Heh.

Ok, so there's many adjectives people can use, and have used to describe me. Tall, curvy, rubenesque, voluptuous, large and "big girl." As in the following story which was my incentive for me finally losing the last 15 lbs of baby weight when my daughter was two: I was rushing through a grocery store in a hurry to get some baby tylenol for one of the two children and was in quite a rush. As I was scanning the aisle looking for the cheapest, yet most effective medicine, I heard an older man chuckling behind me. "Heh. Heh. Heh." I ignored him. As I kept looking, he kept laughing. "Heh, Heh, Heh." It was a slow, amused laugh, obviously directed at me. Finally I turned to him and smiled. And this is the gem he bestowed upon me: "Ya know, I was watching you speed into the store and walk up and down these aisles all quick like, and I just kept watching you, up and down, and up and down and I can't help but think,'You sho does move fast for a big girl!' Heh. Heh. Heh." And off he puttered away just amused as all get out at the BIG GIRL that could move so fast. Yeah, I started running the next day.

I have never been described as svlete, thin, willowy or skinny. Oh no. I was robust since the day I was born. I was always the tallest girl in the photo, the biggest girl in the group. I wore Sears Girls HUSKY jeans. Getting the picture? But I was a tough kid, while clutzy, I was strong. I could hit a homer out of the park, throw a ball farther than anyone. I was the one the coaches wanted to be the catcher, I was the one the track coach came to look for to beg me to try shot put. Yeah, the shot putter. That will turn the guys on. It took me a while to become comfortable with this body. It is not just large, it is extra large. And it did not help matters in middle school that my best friend was a size 2 and she liked for us to dress up in the same clothes. Yeah, pin striped overalls is not a good look for me. And when we both fell for the same first crush? Guess who he walked up to at the 7th grade dance and asked? Yes, Brendan Schubel, I will never, ever hear Madonna's 'Crazy for You' and not weep a little inside.

But I grew into my full height of 5'9 the summer before 9th grade. My body's curves came out and let's just say that was when I realized that there are men that prefer their women to have curves. I never had a hard time attracting the boys after 9th grade, I actually had my stipulations. They had to be at least my height and at least sort of look like I would not crush them. But still, I longed to be a size 8 and I had a goal of weighing 135. Which makes me almost snort coffee out my nose just typing that. But I won't forget the summer before college. I was 17 and determined to weigh 135 by the time I began college in the fall. I was running 5 miles a day and eating roughly the equivalent of an apple and a piece of bread. The morning that I got on the scale and it read 139 lbs, I smiled weakly at the numbers and promptly blacked out. I realized in that moment I like food far too much. As well as ya know, being ALIVE. So I think I went and ate a hamburger and 10 lbs came on all at once. I suppose one day I can be a size 8, but most likely it will be roughly six months after I am dead.

So I embraced being a 'big girl.' I am the girl that can carry the couch, the chair, the anything right there with any man. I am strong and I have endurance. I may not be the fastest, but I bet I can hold out longer than most on lots of things. And let's face it, if there is a food shortage, all you lil' petite girls are going down first. I can live off the fat of the land a while.

And I will say this, my body likes to be bigger. I need to watch myself all the time. If I don't pay attention, I can put on 10 lbs in a week. I am not kidding. I think I was meant to be on a farm popping out kid after kid and working the land. I have what you call, good birthing hips. So I eat carefully, exercise more when I splurge and check the scale a lot. And when I met Best Boyfriend Ever, we were both runners and into eating well. But. Then. We did that thing. You know the one. Where snuggling on the couch at night with a pizza and a bottle of vino sounds way better than sweating and eating a nice salad with lemon water. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about. So for the past 6 months, my jeans have gotten tighter. And I don't like it at all. I have gained 10 - 15 lbs and well, that is not fun for me. So when they decided at my pt job that we were doing the Biggest Loser Challenge, well, I knew it was time. See besides being, large, rubenesque, curvy and big, I am also COMPETITIVE. The challenge ends Dec 17th and there is $275 in the pot. But quite honestly, if I lose 20 lbs, I will GIVE someone $200. Also, I turn 35 on Dec 13th, so being back to my goal weight and fitting into my smaller dresses for Christmas parties in my closet is added incentive.

In the last three weeks we have been doing it, I have lost 6 lbs so far. Weigh in is today at 12pm. I will update you later if I lost any more. I don't want to be itty bitty, i just want to fit into what is already in my closet.

Here, guess which woman in this picture from the other night is ME. I bet it only takes you one guess. (and I am slouching! Could I BE between two tinier women!!)